5 Great Ideas for Movie Remakes

Movie remakes are undeniably popular. From the Rear Window remake Disturbia, in which Shia LaBeouf fights robots and sings Rihanna songs, to the soon to exist Halloween II, people love to watch new versions of things that have been made just fine the first time. Heck, even Judd Apatow's Funny People is a remake of every comedy film made in the past five years (I wonder if Seth Rogen's character will smoke weed). As often as remakes are released, the ease of taking a good idea and reusing it is still not utilized enough. In order to help the film industry, we have compiled a list of five movies just begging to be remade.


5. Citizen Kane

This film, made early on in the career of Orson Welles, is considered by many to be the greatest film ever made. It tells the story of a rich newspaper owner's rise and fall. One could argue that there is not a single problem with this film. But that doesn't mean it couldn't be bastardized for the sake of making money.

The Cast
Charles Foster Kane: Daniel Radcliffe
It makes sense. Here is a young actor whose run in the Harry Potter movies will soon come to an end. Then what will he do? More naked horse banging? As Kane, Radcliffe will cast a spell on the audience. Let's just say his performance would be... magical.

Jedediah Leland: Zac Efron
Joseph Cotton was brilliant as Charles Foster Kane's only friend. In a role that requires humor and heartbreak, it would be hard to find someone who could perform as well as Cotton. Thankfully, the High School Musical actor has already been in a movie about Orson Welles.

Efron's star is on the rise and this role would be perfect to showcase his true abilities. Plus, a musical number called "It's the Sled?" will allow him to exercise those dancing and singing abilities.

Kane prepares a review of "17 Again"

For a film with as much nuance as Citizen Kane, the choice of director is crucial. Someone with true vision is required. Zach Snyder, the director of "films" like 300 and The Watchmen, would be ideal. When Kane utters that first line and drops the snow globe, Snyder will show it in slow motion, capturing each shard of glass. Plus he'll shoot the whole thing in front of a green screen.


4. The Graduate

This film shows how much can go wrong when you get mixed up with an older woman. Despite the cautionary tale the movie is, young men still pray to be mauled by cougars at their college campus dive bars. For a film like this, the person playing the role of Benjamin must bring to the screen that awkwardness Dustin Hoffman had.

"Mrs. Robinson, are you trying to typecast me?"

The music in the original was done by Simon & Garfunkel. For the remake, talent is equally important, but not as important as finding a musical group that is confusingly popular. But what group could do it? Is there a band out there with mind boggling popularity? It has to be a band whose success causes many to either scratch their heads or begin tying a noose.

Perfect.

3. Rocky

In this economy, who wouldn't love to see a remake of the heartwarming tale of a true underdog? Sylvester Stallone brought the character Rocky Balboa to life six times, showing us that no matter what happens, all you need is a barn full of heavy stuff and some steroids to come out on top. Sylvester Stallone was undeniably brilliant in Rocky, so it is basically impossible to find someone who can match his performance. Instead, it would probably be best to go the other way and choose someone who could add a different touch to the character.

Which actor has the physical ability and the acting chops to bring Rocky Balboa to life again? It has to be someone who can believably portray a character who could be considered a "people's champion."

"The Rock says he really enjoyed your portrayal of Idi Amin. He also liked Phone Booth."
"Why are you still talking in the third person?"

There is still one part in the film that hasn't been cast. Mickey, the trainer, is a vital role and choosing a suitable actor is tough. But there is one man for the job.


2. Network

This film predicted the unfortunate fate of legitimate television news once its ability to make money came into play. The performances are stellar, the direction is impeccable. And who hasn't heard the unforgettable line, "I'm mad as hell and I'm not going to take this anymore." It seems that nowadays the Howard Beales of television are shouting about how angry they are, but it has become quite hard to define what their anger comes from (black president?). Nevertheless, the time has come for a remake. It is impossible to use actors as good as the ensemble from the original, so a different direction must be taken. Which people out there could possibly come across as cold, mean, heartless, and immoral as some of the characters from the original?

It will be the loudest movie since "Transformers 2."


1. The Wizard of Oz

You'd be hard pressed to find someone who doesn't love this movie. From childhood nostalgia to syncing the movie with Pink Floyd albums, the appeal of this film is enormous. Admit it... you've tried to find the shadow of the midget who hung himself. A remake is unavoidable. It will be expensive, though. A lot of great actors will be needed to make this movie worth the $10 admission. Did I say a lot of great actors? I meant just one.

I smell another Oscar Nomination!